2010/01/18
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Monday, January 18, 2010 (#18)
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Morning
- Had to go pick up Josh from the Home last night, with no warning, at about 7:15. At least he was in a good mood by the time we got him here. Apparently he was being destructive (again), and they want him on some kind of medication. This is a problem.
- The downstairs toilet no longer flushes adequately, though at least it hasn't taken to flooding. (That might change if I tried to flush it again... don't want to try the experiment when other people might randomly decide to flush it too.)
- Josh used the downstairs toilet sometime during the night, but (amazingly) didn't try to use paper towel to wipe himself. Yay.
12:20
- Finally finished the application to RSI and got it ready to mail (it's been sitting on my desk for weeks now, waiting for a few odd bits of information -- which I ultimately couldn't find anyway -- and a couple of essays, which I printed out from Josh pages)
- Also got Mel's camera strap ready to ship. Hope First Class is safe enough.
- The Home owner emailed to say she will be calling around 1pm to "discuss some solutions". Not mentally prepared to deal with this.
13:40
April called, and suggested that what might work is if we take Josh on weekends -- because that seems to be the time when problems happen -- until we're able to work out something for dealing with his behavior issues (especially the sleeping problem).
I agree, and we work out that I will bring him over between 6 and 7 that evening. (This avoids an awful lot of phone calling, plus having to deal with Josh with the plumbing stopped up.)
14:28
The kids accidentally left the outside door open; Josh goes out, and gets in the minivan (he was hovering around it, and I unlocked it and opened the door for him -- figuring he would be easier to keep track of that way).
Wanting to kill some time and keep Josh in "going places" mode until 17:30 (it takes maybe 20 minutes to get over there), I take him shopping (at about 14:50) -- in the Benz -- and we get a few non-urgent things. Josh seems to enjoy the shopping -- especially running the credit card.
16:17
We get back. Josh doesn't want to get out of the Benz, so I leave him there.
So during the next 2 hours or whatever, I try to keep doing things to cue him that it's not over, we *will* be going somewhere.
At about 10 minutes before time to go, he switches cars -- and gets in the Nissan, which is currently undriveable.
So I continue working outside... I put his bags in the trunk of the Benz -- and he *sees* me doing this, but doesn't react. Whenever I try to open the Nissan's door, he resists.
I do a few more things outside, hoping he will relax... there's still plenty of time, but it's starting to get dark...
I try to show him that the Nissan won't start: put key in ignition, turn it, nothing. (No miracle like with the Benz a couple of years ago.)
In desperation, I get out the jumper cables and start to jump it, thinking "well hell, maybe I *can* get it going... if a cop pulls me over, I'll just explain the situation. Go on, let them give me a hard time under these circumstances."
And that's when Josh escapes from the car and runs around the back of the house. Sandy walks around back to try and head him off -- not a big, intensive chase; just walking after him to try and herd him back... and he darts into the house and goes upstairs and takes off his outdoor stuff (shoes, socks, pants).
So... I tell her to get the stuff he discarded and meet me at the car. I start herding Josh outside. He resists; I don't get really super forceful, and he gets more tenacious... but H shows up with the stuff, and I decide ok, it's time to force this one, so I give him a good haul and manage to get him to the door.
At that point he stops fighting me. I get him in the car, she puts his discarded clothes in with the bags, and we (Josh & I) drive off. And it basically goes fine after that. I'm pretty sure he was totally fine with going there; he didn't make any unhappy noises or anything at any of the landmark turns, when he *must* have known where we were going. He totally cooperates getting dressed over there before I bring him in (not really necessary, but I figure it's a good routine to set); he walked peacefully into the house, carried one of his bags for me, etc.
I get home, and Sandy remembers that we forgot to bring his bookbag.
At 19:47, I get back from delivering that.
The next challenge is whether he will continue to be cooperative tomorrow morning or not. If not, I'll have to go over there at 5:30 again.
20:00
Sandy was able to flush the upstairs toilet without it backing up into the downstairs toilet (though the latter did gurgle a bit). Encouraging. So we haven't reached the point of "hopelessly backed up" just yet.
Ok, we seem to have reached a compromise. Apparently these problems only come up on weekends -- so for now, we will take Josh on weekends, until a solution emerges, and they will take him during the week.
(comments generally agree that this is a fair compromise)
It may actually be more sustainable than full-time (due to Josh essentially refusing to do certain things anywhere but here) -- which may make it less stressful than full-time was turning out to be.