User:Harena/Benjy-Quotes

Decided this would be the best place to archive the Best of Benjamin Quotes. Easier to do by date & access & stuffnthings. Right. Onwards!

2003

• May 23, 2003:
  • "I'm not smiling because my face is not cooperating"
• October 21, 2003:
  • "Woozle, we don't put fire in we're mouth!"

(and no, i have no memory of what precipitated this remark; Woozle says he said something to me {he can't remember what} and apparently Benjamin interpreted it to mean something like having fire in one's mouth...)

• October 24, 2003:
  • "I am not a silly boy, I am a crying boy and I need a hug"
  • ...said when i was giving him a hug & telling him he was silly because 'cause he was crying over something that silly me thought was silly

2004

• January 1, 2004:
  • Benjamin comes trotting into the office & says to me, "You have to be happy mommy.. here, I will kiss you on the elbow and that will make you happy" and then does so.
• May 2, 2004:
  • In reference to the window that was leaking water during the wee thunderstorm & deluge we had.. this was after it was over:
  • "Nothing is coming through by there!"
  • Also, just before that when the sun sorta came back out he said:
  • "The thunderstorm is gone! Now the thunderstorm makes it back morning!

We can't touch the thunderstorm. It makes us scared."

(and yes, that was said all in the same breath)

• May 3, 2004:
  • Re: Balloons gradually shrinking due to loss of air:
  • "These balloons are getting aired off"
• May 6, 2004:
  • On the way to daycare this morning, in the middle of his usual free associating, he came out with this:
  • "When I was your age, Woozle." (pause) then (after some prompting) "I was like your age."

Hollywoodbush

Part 1 May 6, 2004 (PM): Benjamin notices that my arm has scratches on it & asks where they came from: Me: I got them when we cut down the holly bush. Benjamin: holly bush? You mean Hollywood? Part 2 May 7, 2004: He asks again about the scratches, I answer as I had the previous day (from cutting down the holly bush)... the following exchange ensues: B: holly bush? Woozle: Is that like Hollywood? B: Hollywood? Nooooooo, we didn't cut down Hollywood!! Part 3 Date Uncertain; Originally Posted to LJ on May 16, 2004: B: mommy, where'd you get the scratches on your arm? M: from cutting down the holly bush B: holly bush? is that like Hollywood? M: Noooo.... we didn't cut down Hollywood! B: *giggling furiously* Yes you did!

• May 7, 2004:
  • "If you drink water you might grow down like a baby"

• May 23, 2004:
  • During the thunderstorms, Benjamin was heard to say something along these lines (in reference to our house):
  • The house is afraid. But the house doesn't have legs to stand up with. The house can't run away.
  • (No quotes 'cause i'm doing this one from memory & i am kinda paraphrasing from a half asleep state)
• May 27, 2004:
  • That morning from the bathroom, I overheard this being said by Benjamin:
  • "My shadow is eeeeviiil"
  • (I fell off the toilet laughing)

• May 29, 2004:
  • Today whilst Woozle was installing the tow-hitch thingy to the Windstar (so's we can haul some or all of his stuff from Georgia next week) the following conversation ensued:
  • B: What are you doing, Woozle?
  • W: Installing a trailer-hitch...
  • B: A trail-hinge?
  • W: ...so we can bring back a whole bunch of stuff from Georgia
  • B: Georgia? You mean George the monkey?
  • (as in Curious George, i guess!)
• May 30, 2004:
  • It was raining this morning and B wanted to go out in it... he likes to do that.. pull on his boots & get his umbrella and walk in the rain a la Christopher Robin (and yes, he does have black wellies just like CR's ^_^) and so he does....
    
    
  • ...a few minutes later he comes in & announces that he had to come back in because...
  • "The rain is broken."
  • (it had stopped raining!)
• June 6, 2004:
  • This first part is sort of paraphrased 'cause I don't remember exactickly what was said, but the punchline is word for word!
  • B: I'm not feeling well
  • M: Oh? What's the matter?
  • B: My feelings are empty
  • (he was hungry & wanted lunch!)

• June 10, 2004:
  • I did a :P at B in the car on the way home from picking him up & he responded with:
  • "Don't stick out your tongue when you are dead!"
  • I fell over laughing... good thing Woozle was driving!

• June 12, 2004:
  • Whilst sitting on my lap:
  • "I'm getting all heavy on you"

• June 15, 2004:
  • In reference to the clouds breaking up & the sun coming out, he said:
  • "The clouds are melting! All of everything is melting!!"

• September 20, 2004:
  • This morning upon looking into our front-loader washing machine as it was running, he said:
  • "Oh no! The Soap died!! He drunk too many waters so he *died*!"
  • [fx of me scrambling for pen & paper to write it down!]

• October 9, 2004:
  • Benjamin started my morning out thusly:
  • I get up & go to the bathroom. Upon leaving the bathroom, Benjamin greets me with this little ditty:
  • (Sung to the tune of Here We Go Around The Mulberry Bush)
  • This is the way we kill the moms,
  • Kill the moms, kill the moms;
  • This is the way we kill the moms, kill them all to death!
  • (I should note the next verse was "this is the way we kill the dads" so I guess it was nothing personal! ;D)

2005

• March 11, 2005:
  • This'un is only paraphrased rather than directly quoted 'cause, golly, it happened at 6:20 in the freakin' morning!
  • Upon seeing what the tooth fairy brought for the first tooth he lost, he uttered:
  • "I have a dollar & now I can get money with it!"

• March 16, 2005:
  • So Benjamin lost another tooth & put it under his pillow for the tooth fairy & this morning when he retrieved the dollar he got, this is what he said:
  • "I got another dollar!! And it's got George Washington! And he's *STILL* dead!!!"

• September 13, 2005:
  • "People who have too much poop in their butts throw up"

• October 15, 2005:
  • "Pip isn't a real human. He's a cat"

• October 19, 2005:
  • Benjamin comes up to me & says:
  • "I have to whisper something in your ear"
  • and I say, "okay" & he whispers (very solemnly),
    
    
  • "Life Goes On"

• November 23, 2005:
  • Re: The Pumpkin Bread baking in the oven:
  • "It's drying up & raising right now"

• November 23, 2005:
  • Hands me the yarn winder after playing with it so much that it came off the chair arm it was attached to:
  • "...now put it somewhere I can't reach it to spin it"

• December 2, 2005:
  • Wanders into the office and says:
  • "The smell of the lambchop is giving me happy company!"
  • ...and then wanders back out again...

• December 3, 2005:
  • Both he & Zander were hanging off the back of the couch and the following was quoth:
    • "B&Z: A giant cockroach! that we can kill!"
    • "B: with our cockroach torture machine!"
  • same day, different time:

    • "you make us die of laugh!"

• December 25, 2005
  • "It's fun climbing on top of your mom's friend. Who is strong, and sometimes tired." (Referring to climbing on Woozle's shoulders and being carried around)

• December 31, 2005
  • "The nice thing about water is that you don't have to chew it"

2006

• January 1, 2006
  • After showing us a picture he made "of Watership Down" which largely consisted of snails, cars, and "POLICE - 911" signs, which he had done in Tuxpaint, he uttered this:
  • "Next I'm going to do a picture of *not* Watership Down! I'm going to do a picture of the field covered with *blood*, and making everyfing *die*!"

• January 24, 2006
  • Whilst swinging furiously on the swingset:
  • "I'm getting really better at swinging! Soon I won't need anyone to push me anymore!"

• February 24, 2006 6:39pm
  • After smelling daffodils with me:
  • "Daffodils have good effects on your evilness. It hurts your evilness."

• February 26, 2006 (sometime before 7:49am; just not sure when)
  • "One nice thing about crayon sharpeners; They can make the paper come back on"

• February 26, 2006 7:49am
  • Whilst doing crayon-art:
  • "I'm always thinking of pretty colors. Like brown."
  • (he had just pulled out a brown crayon)

• March 6, 2006 6:27pm
  • "When I'm growned up & have my own computer, I'm going to put Dr. Who on it"
  • (Said as we were about to watch Dr. Who on W's computer)

• March 26, 2006
  • Right after Bedtime Story, he said:
  • "I have to say something to you...   Mommy, I like how you smell..."
  • *sniffs*    "You smell like good-looking girl."

• April 6, 2006
  • "You made me nearly [knock over the laptop] and nearly make this house burn down because lesstricity wif wood makes fire! So you nearly made this house burn down!"

• April 20, 2006
  • "The more we don't get fresh air, the more we won't be able to breathe right"