Difference between revisions of "User:Harena/Benjy-Quotes"

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[[Category:Benjy]]
[[File:2003 Benjy quotes note.adj.png|right|200px]]
Decided this would be the best place to archive the Best of Benjamin Quotes. Easier to do by date & access & stuffnthings. Right. Onwards!
Decided this would be the best place to archive the Best of Benjamin Quotes. Easier to do by date & access & stuffnthings. Right. Onwards!


For context, Benjamin was born in April of 1999
(Quotes that are Highlighted have been used as my LJ Headline)
==2003==
*'''May 23, 2003''':
**{{Hilite|"I'm not smiling because my face is not cooperating"}}
*'''October 21, 2003''':
**"Woozle, we don't put fire in we're mouth!"
:(and no, i have no memory of what precipitated this remark; Woozle says he said something to me {he can't remember what} and apparently Benjamin interpreted it to mean something like having fire in one's mouth...)
*'''October 24, 2003''':
*'''October 24, 2003''':
**"I am not a silly boy, I am a crying boy and I need a hug"
**"I am not a silly boy, I am a crying boy and I need a hug"
**''...said when i was giving him a hug & telling him he was silly because 'cause he was crying over something that silly me thought was silly''
**''...said when i was giving him a hug & telling him he was silly because 'cause he was crying over something that silly me thought was silly''
==2004==
*'''January 1, 2004''':
*'''January 1, 2004''':
**''Benjamin comes trotting into the office & says to me,'' "You have to be happy mommy.. here, I will kiss you on the elbow and that will make you happy" ''and then does so.''
**''Benjamin comes trotting into the office & says to me,'' "You have to be happy mommy.. here, I will kiss you on the elbow and that will make you happy" ''and then does so.''
Line 15: Line 26:
::We can't touch the thunderstorm. It makes us scared."
::We can't touch the thunderstorm. It makes us scared."
::''(and yes, that was said all in the same breath)''
::''(and yes, that was said all in the same breath)''
*'''May 3, 2004''':
**''Re: Balloons gradually shrinking due to loss of air:''
**"These balloons are getting aired off"
*'''May 6, 2004''':
**''On the way to daycare this morning, in the middle of his usual free associating, he came out with this:''
**{{Hilite|"When I was your age, Woozle." ''(pause) then (after some prompting)'' "I was like your age."}}
{| style="border: groove 2pt;"
|+'''<big>Hollywoodbush</big>'''
|-
|
<font size=4>Part 1</font>
*'''May 6, 2004 (PM)''':
**''Benjamin notices that my arm has scratches on it & asks where they came from:''
**''Me'': I got them when we cut down the holly bush.
**''Benjamin'': holly bush? You mean Hollywood?
<font size=4>Part 2</font>
*'''May 7, 2004''':
**''He asks again about the scratches, I answer as I had the previous day (from cutting down the holly bush)... the following exchange ensues:''
**''B'': holly bush?
**''Woozle'': Is that like Hollywood?
**''B'': Hollywood? Nooooooo, we didn't cut down Hollywood!!
<font size=4>Part 3</font>
*'''Date Uncertain; Originally Posted to LJ on May 16, 2004''':
**''B'': mommy, where'd you get the scratches on your arm?
**''M'': from cutting down the holly bush
**''B'': holly bush? is that like Hollywood?
**''M'': Noooo.... we didn't cut down Hollywood!
**''B'': *giggling furiously* Yes you did!
|}
*'''May 7, 2004''':
**"If you drink water you might grow down like a baby"
*'''May 23, 2004''':
**''During the thunderstorms, Benjamin was heard to say something along these lines (in reference to our house)'':
**The house is afraid. But the house doesn't have legs to stand up with. The house can't run away.
**''(No quotes 'cause i'm doing this one from memory & i am kinda paraphrasing from a half asleep state)''
*'''May 27, 2004''':
**''That morning from the bathroom, I overheard this being said by Benjamin'':
**"My shadow is eeeeviiil"
**''(I fell off the toilet laughing)''
*'''May 29, 2004''':
**''Today whilst Woozle was installing the tow-hitch thingy to the Windstar (so's we can haul some or all of his stuff from Georgia next week) the following conversation ensued'':
**''B'': What are you doing, Woozle?
**''W'': Installing a trailer-hitch...
**''B'': A trail-hinge?
**''W'': ...so we can bring back a whole bunch of stuff from Georgia
**''B'': Georgia? You mean George the monkey?
**''(as in Curious George, i guess!)''
*'''May 30, 2004''':
**''It was raining this morning and B wanted to go out in it... he likes to do that.. pull on his boots & get his umbrella and walk in the rain a la Christopher Robin (and yes, he does have black wellies just like CR's ^_^) and so he does....''<br><br>
**''...a few minutes later he comes in & announces that he had to come back in because...''
**"The rain is broken."
**''(it had stopped raining!)''
*'''June 6, 2004''':
**''This first part is sort of paraphrased 'cause I don't remember exactickly what was said, but the punchline is word for word!''
**''B'': I'm not feeling well
**''M'': Oh? What's the matter?
**''B'': My feelings are empty
**''(he was hungry & wanted lunch!)''
*'''June 10, 2004''':
**'' I did a :P at B in the car on the way home from picking him up & he responded with:
**"Don't stick out your tongue when you are dead!"
**''I fell over laughing... good thing Woozle was driving!
*'''June 12, 2004''':
**''Whilst sitting on my lap:''
**"I'm getting all heavy on you"
*'''June 15, 2004''':
**''In reference to the clouds breaking up & the sun coming out, he said:''
**"The clouds are melting! All of everything is melting!!"
*'''June 25, 2004''':
**"It's almost starting to done."
*'''September 5, 2004''':
**"I'm going around like an American-Going-Round"'' (Merry-Go-Round)
*'''September 20, 2004''':
**''This morning upon looking into our front-loader washing machine as it was running, he said:''
**"Oh no! The Soap died!! He drunk too many waters so he *died*!"
**''[fx of me scrambling for pen & paper to write it down!]''
*''Later...''
**"The thunderstorm fired all the trees"
*'''October 9, 2004''':
**''Benjamin started my morning out thusly:
**''I get up & go to the bathroom. Upon leaving the bathroom, Benjamin greets me with this little ditty:''
**'''(Sung to the tune of Here We Go Around The Mulberry Bush)'''
**This is the way we kill the moms,
**Kill the moms, kill the moms;
**This is the way we kill the moms, kill them all to death!
**''(I should note the next verse was "this is the way we kill the dads" so I guess it was nothing personal! ;D)''
*'''Sometime in 2004 (probably June)''':
**"Mommy? I was making up a story. I was making up a 'Let's go riding in the CarCar story.' And that's all"
==2005==
*'''March 11, 2005''':
**''This'un is only paraphrased rather than directly quoted 'cause, golly, it happened at 6:20 in the freakin' morning!''
**''Upon seeing what the tooth fairy brought for the first tooth he lost, he uttered:''
**"I have a dollar & now I can get money with it!"
*'''March 16, 2005''':
**''So Benjamin lost another tooth & put it under his pillow for the tooth fairy & this morning when he retrieved the dollar he got, this is what he said:''
**"I got another dollar!! And it's got George Washington! And he's *STILL* dead!!!"
*'''September 13, 2005''':
**{{Hilite|"People who have too much poop in their butts throw up"}}
*'''October 15, 2005''':
**{{Hilite|"Pip isn't a real human. He's a cat"}}
*'''October 19, 2005''':
**''Benjamin comes up to me & says:''
**"I have to whisper something in your ear"
**''and I say,'' "okay" ''& he whispers (very solemnly),''<br><br>
**"Life Goes On"
*'''November 23, 2005''':
**''Re: The Pumpkin Bread baking in the oven:''
**"It's drying up & raising right now"
*'''November 23, 2005''':
**''Hands me the yarn winder after playing with it so much that it came off the chair arm it was attached to:''
**"...now put it somewhere I can't reach it to spin it"
*'''December 2, 2005''':
**''Wanders into the office and says:''
**{{Hilite|"The smell of the lambchop is giving me happy company!"}}
**''...and then wanders back out again...
*'''December 3, 2005''':
**''Both he & Zander were hanging off the back of the couch and the following was quoth:''
***"B&Z: A giant cockroach! that we can kill!"
***"B: with our cockroach torture machine!"
**'''same day, different time:'''
**:*"you make us die of laugh!"
*'''December 20, 2005''':
**''After being told something a second time, he said he '''knew''' because:''
**"...early ago you told me."
*'''December 25, 2005'''
**"It's fun climbing on top of your mom's friend. Who is strong, and sometimes tired." (Referring to climbing on Woozle's shoulders and being carried around)
*'''December 31, 2005'''
**{{Hilite|"The nice thing about water is that you don't have to chew it"}}
==2006==
*'''January 1, 2006'''
**''After showing us a picture he made "of Watership Down" which largely consisted of snails, cars, and "POLICE - 911" signs, which he had done in Tuxpaint, he uttered this:''
**"Next I'm going to do a picture of *not* Watership Down! I'm going to do a picture of the field covered with *blood*, and making everyfing *die*!"
*'''January 24, 2006'''
**''Whilst swinging furiously on the swingset:''
**"I'm getting really better at swinging! Soon I won't need anyone to push me anymore!"
*'''February 24, 2006 6:39pm
**''After smelling daffodils with me:''
**"Daffodils have good effects on your evilness. It hurts your evilness."
[[File:First Daffydillies of 2013.JPG|200px]]
*'''February 26, 2006 (sometime before 7:49am; just not sure when)
**"One nice thing about crayon sharpeners; They can make the paper come back on"
*'''February 26, 2006 7:49am
**''Whilst doing crayon-art:''
**"I'm always thinking of pretty colors. Like brown."
**''(he had just pulled out a brown crayon)''
*'''March 6, 2006 6:27pm
** {{Hilite|"When I'm growned up & have my own computer, I'm going to put Dr. Who on it"}}
**''{{Hilite|(Said as we were about to watch Dr. Who on W's computer)}}
*'''March 26, 2006
**''Right after Bedtime Story, he said:''
**"I have to say something to you... &nbsp; Mommy, I like how you smell..."
**''*sniffs*''&nbsp; &nbsp; "You smell like good-looking girl."
*'''April 6, 2006
**"You made me nearly [knock over the laptop] and nearly make this house burn down because lesstricity wif wood makes fire! So you nearly made this house burn down!"
*'''April 20, 2006
**{{Hilite|"The more we don't get fresh air, the more we won't be able to breathe right"}}
*'''May 9, 2006
**"That took a little bit of a long time."
*'''May 11, 2006, Woozle's Birthday!
**''During an amusing conversation about how old Woozle is today, Benjamin uttered:''
**"You have to be somewhere around Not Old"
* '''July 19, 2006'''
** "Where they ''were'' is where they're not anymore!" &ndash; in reference to Kevin's parents at the end of ''[[wikipedia:Time Bandits|Time Bandits]]''
* '''July 22, 2006 10:53am'''
** It's a good thing Mel can't be melted by fire."''
*'''August 4, 2006
**''After receiving a thingy that [[Anna Nikola]] made & gave to him:''
**"This is like a present except it isn't my birthday or Christmas or ''anything''!"
:-- (as told to me by [[Anna Nikola]])
*'''October 1, 2006
**''Overhead from the living room as B&Z are playing video games. He admits it!''
**Z: Are you mad?
**B (cackling furiously): I'm a Mad Man!
*'''October 7, 2006
**''Whilst recording his own creation on the Yahama Keyboard:''
**"I filled up the *whole* recordment!"
*''...and then moments later, whilst doing a "story":''
**"Terristis are here!"  (say it out loud)
*'''October 8, 2006
**''After seeing me for the first time after [[Woozle]] had trimmed my bangs:''
**"You look more wide awake than wide asleep. Your eyes are wide open."
*'''October 27, 2006
**"If there's thunder and the power goes out, we won't be able to do stuff...
*:
*:
**Unless the power comes back on."
==2007==
*'''January 11, 2007
**''Whilst picking up his dirty clothes from the floor:''
** "All this clothing is under-arrested for stealing the floor!"
*'''January 25, 2007
**''He gets in the car from school with a balloon that has a face drawn on it... and on the way home, he explains:''
** "Mr. Balloon doesn't need to eat or drink but he can die of Being Popped"
**'' And''
** "He'll never get old even though he's an adult still"
*'''February 18, 2007
{|
|-
| align=right | '''B:''' || momomomomom!
|-
| align=right | '''Me:''' || BenBenBen!
|-
| align=right | '''B:''' || I love you!
|-
| align=right | '''Me:''' || I love you too!
|-
| align=right | '''B:''' || Whenever I say "I love you" to someone, invisible hearts appear over my head
|}
*'''February 22, 2007
**"There's, like, infinity in the whole wide world"
**''In reference to the lowly earthworm's domain & possibly their perceptions of it.
*'''March 1, 2007
**"We Humans can get sick... ...Sometimes Humans die of being sick."
*'''April 3, 2007
**"Everywhere we look... there's a Noun. Nothing can prevent there being a Noun... Because if all the nouns were destroyed, we would have a Noun: Nothing."
*'''May 23, 2007
**''To a new babysitter:''
**"I'm the crazy one that usually falls down."
*'''July 28, 2007 at 12:27pm
**''As he was waving goodbye to me after being dropped off with his dad:''
**"See you sometime else!"
*'''September 09, 2007 at 12:17pm
**''He was requesting a movie to watch & I mentioned that I was thinking of playing a movie for Josh but that I didn't think he'd be interested in one of those and he responded with,
**"I ''prefer'' watching violence."
*'''November 13, 2007 at 6:06pm
**''Whilst making scrambledy eggs for Benjamin (he helpt! ^_^) the following interchange occurred:''
{|
|-
| align=right | '''B:''' || Wow, you've got a lot of experience with making scrambled eggs!
|-
| align=right | '''Me:''' || Well, i have been making them for nigh on 30 years now.
|-
| align=right | '''B:''' || (with appropriate amazed look on his face) You're older than Thirty?
|-
| align=right | '''Me:''' || i am older than thirty.
|-
| align=right | '''B:''' || Coooooool.
|}
==2008==
*'''January 8, 2008
**''Randomly:''
**"The weed wacker Prevails"
*'''May 2, 2008
**''Bouncing about at 6:30am:''
**"I'm Enerjective this morning!"
*'''Sept ?, 2008
**"Zander would have had a heart attack of joy [...to see so many chickens at Spence's Farm]!"
*'''December 23, 2008
**''At Sarah's House of Clay Camp:''
**"Like me, Zander has acts of kindness in him; mine are just more random."
==2009==
*'''February 12, 2009
**{{Hilite|"You have to get used to the days you are in"}}
*'''March 7, 2009
**"Zander -- if you find any gerbils named Godzilla, don't let them *anywhere* near our five-dollar bills."
*'''May 31, 2009
**'''Z:''' If Pip were poingy, you'd know he was sick
**'''B:''' Either that or Pip & Kestra's brains got switched!
*'''September 4, 2009
**''Whilst running around in the living room "doing a story (with Z)":''
**"Where is everything?? I can't pick my nose!"
*'''September 19, 2009
**"The more the merrier except when it comes to babies"
*'''September 29, 2009
**"My eyeballs recognize this place by heart"
*'''October 3, 2009
**"Compassion is a very good source of happiness"
==2010==
*'''June 21, 2010
**"I'm glad mom doesn't look her age"
*''And then:''
**"I really had no idea how old you were... I thought you were in your 20's!"
*'''November 28, 2010'''
*''To Zander whilst Z was playing Minecraft''
**"You react to cows like Old People react to kids on their lawn!"
==2011==
*'''March 26, 2011
*''Whilst downstairs making me scrambled eggs & bacon:''
**"Mom is helping me make breakfast by wanting it"
*''Also (as best remembered by W):''
**"If you don't like to see people smile, you may be needing to see a psychiatrist."
*'''May 1, 2011
*''And now for the latest and possibly misunderstood overheard from the other room Benjy Quote:''
**"Speaking of the dogboy<ref name=pip />, here come the Romans!"
*'''October 2, 2011
*''Possibly responding to a notification/alarm on his computer:''
**"Get out of my face, Ubuntu -- you're making me die!"
==2012==
*'''February 16, 2012
**"My name is Benjamin Smith.
**You Annoy Me.
**Prepare to Die"
*'''March 23, 2012
*''After eating dinner:''
**"I appear to have made a mess of myself"
==2015==
'''2015-01-19''' "'I'm almost out of volcanoes,' said a sleep-deprived Benjamin after finding out that he was nearly out of lava droplets." &ndash; Benjamin
'''2015-02-06''' "The pomegranates are reproducing! asexually... as ghosts."
'''2015-04-27''' "We're supposed to be getting ready to go and not talking about vampire boners."
*'''October 10, 2015
*''Whilst Minecrafting
**'"I have aquired[sic] a wellspring of ability to sleep"
==2016==
*'''March 2, 2016
*''Upon seeing a pangolin
**'It's a freaking sloth in armor plating!'
==2017==
[[File:2017-06-20 B&Z quotes.crop-adj.png|right|400px]]
As documented by Benjamin and Zander:
* "It's been a while since we last did RWBY crack after ten." &mdash; Benjamin, June 20{{sup|th}}, after 10
* "I only ever do RWBY Heroin." &mdash; Zander, June 20{{sup|th}}, after after 10
*'''July 16
*''Re: Boss in Monster Den
**"Damn them for being as smart as me!"
*'''November 4, at about 5pm
**"God, Pip, you make a horrible machine-gun." (B helped me remember the quote later.)
*'''Some Time in 2017:
*''From a box top:
**"I'm not the best at Logic even if I'm really good at it"
==2018==
* "Pip makes a good pillow until he starts thrashing." &mdash; January 14, 3:30pm:
*'''May 20, 2018
**''from Discord at 8:45ish pm
**'* first come first serve on predicting when I die &mdash; May 20, 8:45pm
*'''August 6, 2018
**"Now if we could just find another duo-syllabic word that starts with "P" and it fits, that would be perfect."
**''~Realization~
**"Oh shit."
*'''Some time around November 15, 2018
**''Whilst playing RWBY: Amity Arena
***''"Here come the scorpions" *giggles*
==2019==
*'''February 10, 2019
**''from Discord at 7:30ish
***'' "God, why does it have to be a hundred thousand puppies? Why can't it be something reasonable, like ten thousand?"
*'''September 14, 2019
**''During a water outage, B donned rubber gloves so to make clean-up post handling bacon & eggs easier... the process was more difficult than anticipated and along the way, he uttered this:
***''"I can fart through latex!"
==2021==
*'''January 1, 2021
**''at 3:20ish AM
***'' "Well, I can get rid of two zeroe's[sic] really easy. Chop-chop, there they go. On the floor.
*'''July 26, 2021
**''"I don't know how I feel about role-playing lesbians with my brother"
==2023==
* '''May 31, 10:36 AM''' - from the living room:
** ''"No-one cares. We're here for the gay."''
*'''June 21
** '''Draconic Noble — 03/08/2023 10:13 PM:'''
**: One day, I will face the Worm alone
**:...
**:and on that day I shall say "EAT LEAD, DoG!"
** '''Draconic Noble — Today at 5:33 PM:'''
**: Today is the day...
*: ''(He then did indeed proceed to shout this loudly in a gutteral voice.)''
* '''June 23 12:48pm
*: "You might as well build it with swords -- we know you can't do it with yo-yos!"
==Footnotes==
<references>
<ref name=pip>aka [[Pip]]</ref>
</references>
[[Category:Benjy|Harena/Benjy-Quotes]]
[[Category:Quotes|Harena/Benjy-Quotes]]

Latest revision as of 16:52, 23 June 2023

2003 Benjy quotes note.adj.png

Decided this would be the best place to archive the Best of Benjamin Quotes. Easier to do by date & access & stuffnthings. Right. Onwards!

For context, Benjamin was born in April of 1999

(Quotes that are Highlighted have been used as my LJ Headline)

2003

  • May 23, 2003:
    • "I'm not smiling because my face is not cooperating"
  • October 21, 2003:
    • "Woozle, we don't put fire in we're mouth!"
(and no, i have no memory of what precipitated this remark; Woozle says he said something to me {he can't remember what} and apparently Benjamin interpreted it to mean something like having fire in one's mouth...)
  • October 24, 2003:
    • "I am not a silly boy, I am a crying boy and I need a hug"
    • ...said when i was giving him a hug & telling him he was silly because 'cause he was crying over something that silly me thought was silly

2004

  • January 1, 2004:
    • Benjamin comes trotting into the office & says to me, "You have to be happy mommy.. here, I will kiss you on the elbow and that will make you happy" and then does so.
  • May 2, 2004:
    • In reference to the window that was leaking water during the wee thunderstorm & deluge we had.. this was after it was over:
    • "Nothing is coming through by there!"
    • Also, just before that when the sun sorta came back out he said:
    • "The thunderstorm is gone! Now the thunderstorm makes it back morning!
We can't touch the thunderstorm. It makes us scared."
(and yes, that was said all in the same breath)
  • May 3, 2004:
    • Re: Balloons gradually shrinking due to loss of air:
    • "These balloons are getting aired off"
  • May 6, 2004:
    • On the way to daycare this morning, in the middle of his usual free associating, he came out with this:
    • "When I was your age, Woozle." (pause) then (after some prompting) "I was like your age."


Hollywoodbush

Part 1

  • May 6, 2004 (PM):
    • Benjamin notices that my arm has scratches on it & asks where they came from:
    • Me: I got them when we cut down the holly bush.
    • Benjamin: holly bush? You mean Hollywood?

Part 2

  • May 7, 2004:
    • He asks again about the scratches, I answer as I had the previous day (from cutting down the holly bush)... the following exchange ensues:
    • B: holly bush?
    • Woozle: Is that like Hollywood?
    • B: Hollywood? Nooooooo, we didn't cut down Hollywood!!

Part 3

  • Date Uncertain; Originally Posted to LJ on May 16, 2004:
    • B: mommy, where'd you get the scratches on your arm?
    • M: from cutting down the holly bush
    • B: holly bush? is that like Hollywood?
    • M: Noooo.... we didn't cut down Hollywood!
    • B: *giggling furiously* Yes you did!


  • May 7, 2004:
    • "If you drink water you might grow down like a baby"
  • May 23, 2004:
    • During the thunderstorms, Benjamin was heard to say something along these lines (in reference to our house):
    • The house is afraid. But the house doesn't have legs to stand up with. The house can't run away.
    • (No quotes 'cause i'm doing this one from memory & i am kinda paraphrasing from a half asleep state)
  • May 27, 2004:
    • That morning from the bathroom, I overheard this being said by Benjamin:
    • "My shadow is eeeeviiil"
    • (I fell off the toilet laughing)
  • May 29, 2004:
    • Today whilst Woozle was installing the tow-hitch thingy to the Windstar (so's we can haul some or all of his stuff from Georgia next week) the following conversation ensued:
    • B: What are you doing, Woozle?
    • W: Installing a trailer-hitch...
    • B: A trail-hinge?
    • W: ...so we can bring back a whole bunch of stuff from Georgia
    • B: Georgia? You mean George the monkey?
    • (as in Curious George, i guess!)
  • May 30, 2004:
    • It was raining this morning and B wanted to go out in it... he likes to do that.. pull on his boots & get his umbrella and walk in the rain a la Christopher Robin (and yes, he does have black wellies just like CR's ^_^) and so he does....

    • ...a few minutes later he comes in & announces that he had to come back in because...
    • "The rain is broken."
    • (it had stopped raining!)
  • June 6, 2004:
    • This first part is sort of paraphrased 'cause I don't remember exactickly what was said, but the punchline is word for word!
    • B: I'm not feeling well
    • M: Oh? What's the matter?
    • B: My feelings are empty
    • (he was hungry & wanted lunch!)
  • June 10, 2004:
    • I did a :P at B in the car on the way home from picking him up & he responded with:
    • "Don't stick out your tongue when you are dead!"
    • I fell over laughing... good thing Woozle was driving!
  • June 12, 2004:
    • Whilst sitting on my lap:
    • "I'm getting all heavy on you"
  • June 15, 2004:
    • In reference to the clouds breaking up & the sun coming out, he said:
    • "The clouds are melting! All of everything is melting!!"
  • June 25, 2004:
    • "It's almost starting to done."
  • September 5, 2004:
    • "I'm going around like an American-Going-Round" (Merry-Go-Round)
  • September 20, 2004:
    • This morning upon looking into our front-loader washing machine as it was running, he said:
    • "Oh no! The Soap died!! He drunk too many waters so he *died*!"
    • [fx of me scrambling for pen & paper to write it down!]


  • Later...
    • "The thunderstorm fired all the trees"


  • October 9, 2004:
    • Benjamin started my morning out thusly:
    • I get up & go to the bathroom. Upon leaving the bathroom, Benjamin greets me with this little ditty:
    • (Sung to the tune of Here We Go Around The Mulberry Bush)
    • This is the way we kill the moms,
    • Kill the moms, kill the moms;
    • This is the way we kill the moms, kill them all to death!
    • (I should note the next verse was "this is the way we kill the dads" so I guess it was nothing personal! ;D)


  • Sometime in 2004 (probably June):
    • "Mommy? I was making up a story. I was making up a 'Let's go riding in the CarCar story.' And that's all"

2005

  • March 11, 2005:
    • This'un is only paraphrased rather than directly quoted 'cause, golly, it happened at 6:20 in the freakin' morning!
    • Upon seeing what the tooth fairy brought for the first tooth he lost, he uttered:
    • "I have a dollar & now I can get money with it!"
  • March 16, 2005:
    • So Benjamin lost another tooth & put it under his pillow for the tooth fairy & this morning when he retrieved the dollar he got, this is what he said:
    • "I got another dollar!! And it's got George Washington! And he's *STILL* dead!!!"


  • September 13, 2005:
    • "People who have too much poop in their butts throw up"


  • October 15, 2005:
    • "Pip isn't a real human. He's a cat"


  • October 19, 2005:
    • Benjamin comes up to me & says:
    • "I have to whisper something in your ear"
    • and I say, "okay" & he whispers (very solemnly),

    • "Life Goes On"


  • November 23, 2005:
    • Re: The Pumpkin Bread baking in the oven:
    • "It's drying up & raising right now"


  • November 23, 2005:
    • Hands me the yarn winder after playing with it so much that it came off the chair arm it was attached to:
    • "...now put it somewhere I can't reach it to spin it"


  • December 2, 2005:
    • Wanders into the office and says:
    • "The smell of the lambchop is giving me happy company!"
    • ...and then wanders back out again...
  • December 3, 2005:
    • Both he & Zander were hanging off the back of the couch and the following was quoth:
      • "B&Z: A giant cockroach! that we can kill!"
      • "B: with our cockroach torture machine!"
    • same day, different time:
      • "you make us die of laugh!"


  • December 20, 2005:
    • After being told something a second time, he said he knew because:
    • "...early ago you told me."


  • December 25, 2005
    • "It's fun climbing on top of your mom's friend. Who is strong, and sometimes tired." (Referring to climbing on Woozle's shoulders and being carried around)


  • December 31, 2005
    • "The nice thing about water is that you don't have to chew it"

2006

  • January 1, 2006
    • After showing us a picture he made "of Watership Down" which largely consisted of snails, cars, and "POLICE - 911" signs, which he had done in Tuxpaint, he uttered this:
    • "Next I'm going to do a picture of *not* Watership Down! I'm going to do a picture of the field covered with *blood*, and making everyfing *die*!"
  • January 24, 2006
    • Whilst swinging furiously on the swingset:
    • "I'm getting really better at swinging! Soon I won't need anyone to push me anymore!"
  • February 24, 2006 6:39pm
    • After smelling daffodils with me:
    • "Daffodils have good effects on your evilness. It hurts your evilness."

First Daffydillies of 2013.JPG

  • February 26, 2006 (sometime before 7:49am; just not sure when)
    • "One nice thing about crayon sharpeners; They can make the paper come back on"
  • February 26, 2006 7:49am
    • Whilst doing crayon-art:
    • "I'm always thinking of pretty colors. Like brown."
    • (he had just pulled out a brown crayon)
  • March 6, 2006 6:27pm
    • "When I'm growned up & have my own computer, I'm going to put Dr. Who on it"
    • (Said as we were about to watch Dr. Who on W's computer)
  • March 26, 2006
    • Right after Bedtime Story, he said:
    • "I have to say something to you...   Mommy, I like how you smell..."
    • *sniffs*    "You smell like good-looking girl."


  • April 6, 2006
    • "You made me nearly [knock over the laptop] and nearly make this house burn down because lesstricity wif wood makes fire! So you nearly made this house burn down!"
  • April 20, 2006
    • "The more we don't get fresh air, the more we won't be able to breathe right"


  • May 9, 2006
    • "That took a little bit of a long time."


  • May 11, 2006, Woozle's Birthday!
    • During an amusing conversation about how old Woozle is today, Benjamin uttered:
    • "You have to be somewhere around Not Old"


  • July 19, 2006
    • "Where they were is where they're not anymore!" – in reference to Kevin's parents at the end of Time Bandits


  • July 22, 2006 10:53am
    • It's a good thing Mel can't be melted by fire."


  • August 4, 2006
    • After receiving a thingy that Anna Nikola made & gave to him:
    • "This is like a present except it isn't my birthday or Christmas or anything!"
-- (as told to me by Anna Nikola)


  • October 1, 2006
    • Overhead from the living room as B&Z are playing video games. He admits it!
    • Z: Are you mad?
    • B (cackling furiously): I'm a Mad Man!


  • October 7, 2006
    • Whilst recording his own creation on the Yahama Keyboard:
    • "I filled up the *whole* recordment!"
  • ...and then moments later, whilst doing a "story":
    • "Terristis are here!" (say it out loud)


  • October 8, 2006
    • After seeing me for the first time after Woozle had trimmed my bangs:
    • "You look more wide awake than wide asleep. Your eyes are wide open."


  • October 27, 2006
    • "If there's thunder and the power goes out, we won't be able to do stuff...
    • Unless the power comes back on."

2007

  • January 11, 2007
    • Whilst picking up his dirty clothes from the floor:
    • "All this clothing is under-arrested for stealing the floor!"


  • January 25, 2007
    • He gets in the car from school with a balloon that has a face drawn on it... and on the way home, he explains:
    • "Mr. Balloon doesn't need to eat or drink but he can die of Being Popped"
    • And
    • "He'll never get old even though he's an adult still"


  • February 18, 2007
B: momomomomom!
Me: BenBenBen!
B: I love you!
Me: I love you too!
B: Whenever I say "I love you" to someone, invisible hearts appear over my head


  • February 22, 2007
    • "There's, like, infinity in the whole wide world"
    • In reference to the lowly earthworm's domain & possibly their perceptions of it.


  • March 1, 2007
    • "We Humans can get sick... ...Sometimes Humans die of being sick."


  • April 3, 2007
    • "Everywhere we look... there's a Noun. Nothing can prevent there being a Noun... Because if all the nouns were destroyed, we would have a Noun: Nothing."


  • May 23, 2007
    • To a new babysitter:
    • "I'm the crazy one that usually falls down."


  • July 28, 2007 at 12:27pm
    • As he was waving goodbye to me after being dropped off with his dad:
    • "See you sometime else!"


  • September 09, 2007 at 12:17pm
    • He was requesting a movie to watch & I mentioned that I was thinking of playing a movie for Josh but that I didn't think he'd be interested in one of those and he responded with,
    • "I prefer watching violence."


  • November 13, 2007 at 6:06pm
    • Whilst making scrambledy eggs for Benjamin (he helpt! ^_^) the following interchange occurred:
B: Wow, you've got a lot of experience with making scrambled eggs!
Me: Well, i have been making them for nigh on 30 years now.
B: (with appropriate amazed look on his face) You're older than Thirty?
Me: i am older than thirty.
B: Coooooool.

2008

  • January 8, 2008
    • Randomly:
    • "The weed wacker Prevails"
  • May 2, 2008
    • Bouncing about at 6:30am:
    • "I'm Enerjective this morning!"
  • Sept ?, 2008
    • "Zander would have had a heart attack of joy [...to see so many chickens at Spence's Farm]!"
  • December 23, 2008
    • At Sarah's House of Clay Camp:
    • "Like me, Zander has acts of kindness in him; mine are just more random."

2009

  • February 12, 2009
    • "You have to get used to the days you are in"


  • March 7, 2009
    • "Zander -- if you find any gerbils named Godzilla, don't let them *anywhere* near our five-dollar bills."


  • May 31, 2009
    • Z: If Pip were poingy, you'd know he was sick
    • B: Either that or Pip & Kestra's brains got switched!


  • September 4, 2009
    • Whilst running around in the living room "doing a story (with Z)":
    • "Where is everything?? I can't pick my nose!"


  • September 19, 2009
    • "The more the merrier except when it comes to babies"


  • September 29, 2009
    • "My eyeballs recognize this place by heart"


  • October 3, 2009
    • "Compassion is a very good source of happiness"

2010

  • June 21, 2010
    • "I'm glad mom doesn't look her age"
  • And then:
    • "I really had no idea how old you were... I thought you were in your 20's!"


  • November 28, 2010
  • To Zander whilst Z was playing Minecraft
    • "You react to cows like Old People react to kids on their lawn!"


2011

  • March 26, 2011
  • Whilst downstairs making me scrambled eggs & bacon:
    • "Mom is helping me make breakfast by wanting it"
  • Also (as best remembered by W):
    • "If you don't like to see people smile, you may be needing to see a psychiatrist."


  • May 1, 2011
  • And now for the latest and possibly misunderstood overheard from the other room Benjy Quote:
    • "Speaking of the dogboy[1], here come the Romans!"


  • October 2, 2011
  • Possibly responding to a notification/alarm on his computer:
    • "Get out of my face, Ubuntu -- you're making me die!"

2012

  • February 16, 2012
    • "My name is Benjamin Smith.
    • You Annoy Me.
    • Prepare to Die"


  • March 23, 2012
  • After eating dinner:
    • "I appear to have made a mess of myself"

2015

2015-01-19 "'I'm almost out of volcanoes,' said a sleep-deprived Benjamin after finding out that he was nearly out of lava droplets." – Benjamin


2015-02-06 "The pomegranates are reproducing! asexually... as ghosts."


2015-04-27 "We're supposed to be getting ready to go and not talking about vampire boners."


  • October 10, 2015
  • Whilst Minecrafting
    • '"I have aquired[sic] a wellspring of ability to sleep"


2016

  • March 2, 2016
  • Upon seeing a pangolin
    • 'It's a freaking sloth in armor plating!'

2017

2017-06-20 B&Z quotes.crop-adj.png

As documented by Benjamin and Zander:

  • "It's been a while since we last did RWBY crack after ten." — Benjamin, June 20th, after 10
  • "I only ever do RWBY Heroin." — Zander, June 20th, after after 10


  • July 16
  • Re: Boss in Monster Den
    • "Damn them for being as smart as me!"


  • November 4, at about 5pm
    • "God, Pip, you make a horrible machine-gun." (B helped me remember the quote later.)


  • Some Time in 2017:
  • From a box top:
    • "I'm not the best at Logic even if I'm really good at it"



2018

  • "Pip makes a good pillow until he starts thrashing." — January 14, 3:30pm:


  • May 20, 2018
    • from Discord at 8:45ish pm
    • '* first come first serve on predicting when I die — May 20, 8:45pm
  • August 6, 2018
    • "Now if we could just find another duo-syllabic word that starts with "P" and it fits, that would be perfect."
    • ~Realization~
    • "Oh shit."


  • Some time around November 15, 2018
    • Whilst playing RWBY: Amity Arena
      • "Here come the scorpions" *giggles*

2019

  • February 10, 2019
    • from Discord at 7:30ish
      • "God, why does it have to be a hundred thousand puppies? Why can't it be something reasonable, like ten thousand?"
  • September 14, 2019
    • During a water outage, B donned rubber gloves so to make clean-up post handling bacon & eggs easier... the process was more difficult than anticipated and along the way, he uttered this:
      • "I can fart through latex!"

2021

  • January 1, 2021
    • at 3:20ish AM
      • "Well, I can get rid of two zeroe's[sic] really easy. Chop-chop, there they go. On the floor.
  • July 26, 2021
    • "I don't know how I feel about role-playing lesbians with my brother"

2023

  • May 31, 10:36 AM - from the living room:
    • "No-one cares. We're here for the gay."
  • June 21
    • Draconic Noble — 03/08/2023 10:13 PM:
      One day, I will face the Worm alone
      ...
      and on that day I shall say "EAT LEAD, DoG!"
    • Draconic Noble — Today at 5:33 PM:
      Today is the day...
    (He then did indeed proceed to shout this loudly in a gutteral voice.)
  • June 23 12:48pm
    "You might as well build it with swords -- we know you can't do it with yo-yos!"

Footnotes

  1. aka Pip