2005-08-21 Edmail

This was too funny. So I had to post it.

Me to Ed

From:	Woozle <email address>
To:	(Ed's name) <email address>
Subject:	follow-up
Date:	Sun, 21 Aug 2005 09:33:44 -0400
Mailer:	Evolution 2.2.1.1

When I first replied to this email, I couldn't decide if something along the lines of "so, how ya doin'?" would fall into the category of meaningless social noise. By the time I had finished the replying process, the social-noise-evaluation process was still forked and hadn't returned with a result, so I thought I had better send the email as-was rather than waiting.

Since then, I have reached the decision that it couldn't do any harm, and might even go some way to make up for my total lack of communication since, uh, our last communication. (Whenever that was.)

So... how ya doin'?

N.

Ed to me

From:	(Ed's name) <email address>
To:	Woozle <email address>
Subject:	Re: follow-up
Date:	Sun, 21 Aug 2005 11:23:02 -0400
Mailer:	Internet Mail Service (5.5.2657.72)

I'm doin' awright. How 'bout you?

I don't mind meaningless social noise. My difficulty in dealing with the "How ya doin?" question is figuring out, quickly enough, this time, what is the right answer. Is it the sarcasm of "Oh man, it's another day in paradise!", the camaraderie of "Couldn't be better. How's yer mom'n'them?", or the directness of "Well, ya know I got that chronic urinary tract trouble, an it's been really bad the past two days. Like a red-hot coat hanger wire up my dick. Worst is I got it from my whore of a wife, who got it from the UPS driver, an I know the bitch's been with him again. The only relief I get is the distraction of hearin about the new trouble the kids have found at college. All that damn money I'm spendin, and they go and ..."

It's still better than the "How's it goin?" question. As an IT professional, I can't think of a more aggravating, frustrating question. So many people in so many places spend so much time walking around asking each other "How's it goin?" that thinking about the inefficiency and inevitable errors makes me shudder. One would think that even in a Republican-dominated government like ours, hell, especially in a Republican-dominated government, the governors would recognize the benefits of an Internet-accessible database that members of the public can query once a day, or as often as needed, to get THE right answer. No more discrepancies, no more searching for someone who seems to have the inside information, just quick reliable information that allows us all to get on with our business.

(end excerpt)