Marriage boycott

or,

Why We Refuse to Get Married

• Entering into marriage would mean effectively signing a contract where:
  • we don't get to read all the applicable rules before signing (much less set them ourselves)
  • the applicable rules change from state to state
  • the applicable rules can be changed over time, without our consent
• Until marriage is available to everyone, it discriminates unfairly against anyone who doesn't fit the standard model.
• It is too restrictive and doesn't allow for the kind of family we ultimately want to build.
• Both of us have tried marriage (Harena twice, Woozle once), and found it an entirely unsatisfactory tool for strengthening a relationship. It tended to push our relationships with our spouses – and our lives – in directions in which we did not want to go, weakening desirable elements of the relationship and initially hiding flaws which only became apparent later on.

There are a couple of other reasons which might be considered TMI by more socially-conservative folk; they are here.

We are not the only "couple" boycotting marriage; see issuepedia:marriage boycott.

Links

• 2012-06-25 Cindy Brown makes some similar and related points