User:Woozle/blog/2009-07-04 1602 Joshing in the Men's Room/var/$text.below

The reasoning was as follows:

• The last time anyone tried to take Josh swimming at the Duke Faculty Club, he refused to get in the water but seemed content to play in the playground.
• Josh had found his swimsuit and towel, and was carrying them around the house.
• Therefore: Perhaps he would like to be taken to the playground at the Duke Faculty Club!

Brilliant, yes? We can walk there from our house, crossing only one real road, by taking the jogging trail -- thus giving Josh a pleasant and relatively safe walk into the bargain. Seems like an all-around winner.

I put off doing this for several days after thinking of it, on the theory that it should be held in reserve for when Josh was clearly wanting to go out and there clearly was time to do it (e.g. a Saturday, like today). Josh had been showing clear signs of boredom all day, was carrying his swimsuit and towel around, and we had run through the list of alternatives, so it seemed like time to try it.

Everything went fine at first. (Actually, at first he wouldn't come along; he was probably hoping his grandparents would be picking him up to go somewhere, but eventually he decided that I was the best bet.) He followed me all the way down Pinecrest, across 751, and through the jogging trail -- somewhat reluctantly, but without any significant problems.

He showed signs of excitement as the pool came into view, but he did not try to go in the main FC entrance and came along to the playground area with no problems. He orbited the playground a few times (balancing on the railroad ties), tried one of the structures, orbited some more... and eventually showed signs of wanting to go.

I cued him that we were going home, and we started walking back towards the main entrance to the FC -- which is where the trouble began. He tried to force his way past me into the FC entrance; I grabbed him and forced him away -- at which point he dropped the towel and bathing suit he had been carrying the whole time, doubled back and ran around the right side of the building, across some landscaping, and quickly ducked into the men's changing room.

That was when I called Sandy for a rescue. I ducked my head in quickly to see if he was causing problems, and he was just sort of walking around... so I went back out and sat outside in a spot where I could corral him if he came back out. (If I were inside the changing room, it would be easier for him to escape -- and he would be more likely to try to get away from me.)

When Sandy arrived about 8 minutes later, I handed her all the things I was carrying (bathing suit, towel, water bottle) and went into the changing room to retrieve him -- and found him just taking off the last of his clothes.

He refused to put anything back on, either -- and from experience I know that even two of us cannot make him get dressed if he doesn't want to. He tried to run out of the changing room too, and I only just barely stopped him by slamming the door closed (Sandy -- who was waiting outside -- confirms that nobody was trying to get in, but this could have been nasty if someone had been.) So we have one stark naked adult-sized 16-y.o. boy running around, one maybe-10-y.o. naked boy in a shower peeking out looking a bit worried, and me (who doesn't like being in men's changing rooms at all even under the best of circumstances).

I told Sandy about the situation, and she very sensibly handed me his swimsuit -- which he happily put on -- and then escorted him out the door held his arm rigidly when he tried to duck towards the pool (why wouldn't you go there when we wanted you to, silly boy?), and he basically cooperated the rest of the way back to the car and didn't fight the idea of going inside the house.

And that's the end of the adventure, except to note that this is now on the list of things I am never, ever going to try to do again with Josh unless someone else is responsible for dealing with the situation.